Friends who know me well all have a running joke that I have a gypsy who stays locked inside me.
From time to time, she rears her wild head of reckless curls and induces a feeling of restlessness and wanderlust I can’t ignore.
This week, my gypsy was awoken.
Perhaps it is the fact I am turning 30 this year, or that the plans with the farm house are so close to coming to fruition, or that I work so very much of the time. Whatever the reason, she woke up and loudly proclaimed her prescence.
It has always been hard for me to wrap my head around “forever.” I am not a lover of permanent decisions, I like the freedom to come and go, the opportunity to change my mind or take back a choice.
Building a forever farmhouse is definitely a permanent decision, it is a huge financial obligation, and an obvious forever commitment.
I have been so blessed in my life to find a partner who understands my gypsy soul and is able to love me in such a profound way, I never feel confined like I have felt in the past.
Neil and I both love adventures and have a commitment to each other to never let our love get mundane and ordinary.
I sometimes find myself daydreaming about a different life- one where my hair is always braided, all I own is in a bag on my back and I have no obligation to punch a clock every day.
Connecting with friends and animals have also brought peace to my sometimes wandering soul. Over my adult life, I’ve built a world for myself filled with people who chose to love and spend time with me, and this has kept me grounded when my gypsy starts her internal pacing.
Being able to walk out my door and see the growth my garden is making and my goats jumping joyfully in their pen, bring a fulfillment I don’t get from my many adult obligations.
Being able to look over and see Neil’s familiar, smiling face, feel his strong arms around me pulling me in for a kiss, remind me of why I work so much and so hard.
I am so grateful I have a life where I can mostly balance my love of freedom and adventure with many responsibilities and obligations.
Do you ever daydream of a different life?
Until next time…
